A simple game
by Coneofwonders
Summary: MT4 Competition entry. When Mike gets roped into a game of Truth and Dare, will he come out with his pride or humiliation?


Welp, here we are again. Another saturday night. You know, that time where me plus the other members of the Jade palace get the chance to actually relax without worry of Shifu making us train until our limbs fall off? Well... most of us anyway as far as the metaphor goes. Moving on, the furious five managed to walk off the hours upon hours of torturous training without breaking a sweat. I suppose that shouldn't be surprising, given the fact that they've been doing the same routine for God knows how many years. Me and Po however... not so much.

All I'll say about it is that if I had a single yuan coin for everytime I dragged my scaly body through the barrack doors, gasping for oxygen like there was no tomorrow, I'd probably rival the emperor in terms of fortune.

Today was no different. I had made it once again to the barracks while trying my hardest not to suffer a heart attack as the organ beat against my chest twice every second. The only thing which mattered most to me was climbing into bed, fall asleep and forget all about my aching muscles which continued to scream for mercy.

Though that would not be a granted request tonight.

Instead, I could hear chattering from behind the closed doors of the kitchen. Usually it wouldn't bother me, but it wasn't like I had anything better to do so I checked it out anyway to see what was going on.

Inside was none other than every member of the five and Po, who by whatever miracle had reached the barracks after training before I had. Usually it was the other way round. Meh, maybe he found out about where Monkey was keeping his almond cookies again. Anyway, the second I opened the doors, all six pairs of eyes looked right at me as though they had just been caught doing something illegal.

Alright... very creepy...

I swear if these lot weren't my friends, I'd be expecting to be stabbed or something any minute now. Thankfully the awkward silence dissolved after Po spoke up.

"Well, look who decided to join in". He smiled while adding in a cocky smile.

I just know I'm going to regret saying this but... "Join in what"? I had to ask, knowing I should have just slithered on by when I had the chance.

"What else? Truth or dare"!

I blinked. Truth or dare? Well... I guess it explains why they seemed so suspicious when I came in, probably thinking I was Shifu. I can just imagine the little furball catching them in the act and giving them all a lecture on how this sort of behavious is unbecoming of a kung fu warrior or some bs like that. But anyway, getting back to Po's statement, obviously with that large inviting grin on his face he was expecting me to join in. Mater of fact, now that I think about it, how in the hell did he get Tigress to join in? Still, my answer was rather straight forward.

"Nope".

And with that I HAD planned on leaving there and there, if not for a certain snake whom I may or may not be in a relationship with, thwarting my escape.

"Come on Mike, it's all in good fun". Viper tried assuring me as she slithered off from her chair and up to me. "An extra player would be much appreciated".

"Aw come on Viper, you can't be serious". I moaned.

"Please"?

"No". I responded, sticking to my guns.

At this she pouted. With the most adorable face she could muster I might add. It took a lot of will power just not to smile and go aww at it.

"Ah, come on Mike, give it a try". Monkey spoke up, along with Mantis.

"Yeah man, what's not to like? It's not like we're gonna make you do anything super embarrassing. Probably"...

Forigve me if I'm not so easily convinced.

"I'm sorry, how old are you guys again"?

"Har de har har"! Mocked Mantis as he stuck his tounge out at me just for good measure.

"Look, the answer is no, okay? final decision".

Not that I find truth or dare boring but... I really did not enjoy it. Not one bit. I mean take it from my view. Who would want to sit around in a circle while forcing your friend, and yourself, to do stupid embarrassing stuff? And knowing a few faces before me I had reason to believe that it would be the extreme version of the game.

However, despite my decision, there was one thing I had not expected on, even though I really should have expected it at once. Po's persistance.

"Come on Mike, it'll be awesome! Don't be a sour puss like ol' Tigress here"! He tried reasoning while either ignoring or not noticing the annoyed death glare sent his way by a certain feline.

"Po I'm not doing it".

"Aw, please"?

"No".

"Please"?

"No".

"Please"?

"No"!

Please"?

"NO"!

So yeah, this took up a good twenty seconds of my time as myself and Po repeated the same words to each other over and over and over again while everyone elses head turned left and right towards whoever was speaking. Kind of something like you'd see on TV. And eventually, to my great regret, I caved.

"Alright! ALRIGHT ALREADY I'LL PLAY! GOD"!

I really need to work on training my will power next session.

At my short tempered response, Po finally shut his gob and smiled. I did my best to ignore it and climbed onto the only empty seat that stood between Viper and Monkey. So now here we all were, surrounding the kitchen table now currently deciding on who should go first.

Oh my poor friend Po. You better hope that I don't get picked for your sake. I can be pretty creative when I want to be with pranks...

Eventually, and surprisingly, Crane was the one to get the ball rolling as he spun the empty bottle on the middle of the table. Yup, you heard right. A bottle. Seems we're playing the old version of the game.

So the bottle spun round and round, making everyone exept Tigress nervous. Especially when it finally began slowing down landing on... Monkey. Oh this was going to be interesting.

"Alright Monkey, truth or dare"? The avian asked.

"Dare". Monkey claimed with crossed arms and a big smirk on his own face, telling the world _bring it on_.

"In that case, I dare you to... hand over all of your almond cookies over to Po".

Aaaaand just like that the primates face dropped to shock, then into a scowl. A few seconds of silence passed before he got up, climbing up to the top shelves of the kitchen where he kept said cookies, all while muttering something under his breath. Something told me that it wasn't anything child friendly towards Crane. Once Monkey dropped back down he held a small cookie jar. He then just walked up to Po and nearly slammed the thing down on the table in front of him. He then left and took his seat, not looking back as Po devoured the tasty treats before him.

Now it was whoever was on the left of Crane who would go next. Which happened to be Mantis. Welcome to the R rated version of the game.

Mantis spun the bottle at once. It spun quickly, then slowed down landing on... Viper. Thank God that Yinshen wasn't here. I could only imagine the dares and truths Mantis would have in store for the poor panther. None of them pleasant either.

Viper at once decided on dare.

"Okay then Viper"... The bug smirked, while also looking at me to my shock and slight horror. "I dare you, tomorrow, to find Shifu, and tell him that you're pregnant".

"WHAT"?! Viper and myself snapped, horrified at the idea. Do you have any idea what Shifu will do to us? Especially once he figures out it was a prank!?

We both looked at each other with nervous faces for a while before Viper finally nodded, accepting her fate. I sighed and turned back to Mantis.

"I effing hate you"...

Trust me. I would have said more than that if Monkey hadn't quickly continued on with the game and spun the bottle. This time it landed on Po.

"Truth or dare Po"?

"Truth".

"Okay then, in that case... is it true you have a crush on Tigress"?

Oh yeah, I forgot about that! For those who don't know there's been quite a number of people who have mistaken Po and Tigress as a couple. Heck if I know why, they're nothing alike. Still, it's always funny whenever a young kid villager runs up to one of them and asks if they're in a relationship. The blushes on their faces whenever it happens gets me laughing every time. Next thing you know people are eventually going to ship them together and call them... God, I don't know... Po-Gress? Ti-Po? Meh... let the fans decide on that one.

Po almost at once waved his hands defensively.

"Oh nonono, we're just friends. Friends who hang out a lot... like besties, you know"?

Tigresses reaction was slightly different. She was trying to cover her annoyed face which held a blush. How cute.

Monkey and Mantis just looked at each other with large smiles knowing different. Everyone else, including myself tried not to laugh at their misfortune.

Continuing on with the game, I was a little happier to see that it was now my turn. I calmly spun the bottle and watched it spin round until it landed on... Tigress. Oh this was almost too perfect.

"Truth or dare Tigress"?

"Dare".

Yeah, who in the world could have seen that one coming I wonder...?

"Very well. I dare you, Tigress to... kiss Po. On the lips".

Yep, two slaps in the face for one. One for Tigress and one for Po. Maybe that'll teach him not to drag me into his games next time. It was rather amusing to see Tigresse's hardcore face fall at once, as well as seeing her ears droop down slightly. It only lasted for a second before her face tightened into a scowl before hesitantly leaning over to Po, gave him a quick peck on the lips before vastly retreating to her side, looking away from Po as he just put his hands to his lips then pulled it away to look at it, seemingly thinking _did that really just happen?_

You know, if anyone outside of our little group were to witness that tender moment, I'd bet you that the fanfiction on it would be endless.

Ah well, I've had my fun I suppose. Now onto Viper who spun the bottle. When it stopped after several seconds it landed on... Crane.

"Truth or dare Crane"?

"Truth please".

"Very well. Is it true that you used to have a crush on me"?

Whoa okaaaaay! Well that was most certainly unexpected! Hopefully noone noticed that sudden twitch in my eye!

Crane ruffled his wings nervously.

"W-well... I will admit that I may have had... a bit of a crush on you, years ago... but I outgrew it and moved on".

That was all that was said. And I'm sure he added on those last two sentences just so I won't get angry with him. Still, what's done is done. And besides if I'm being honest with myself, I can't really blame him, I mean, Viper is stunning beautiful to say the least. And even if they were together,I'd just be happy that they would be happy, right?

I still caught the few looks from Crane as though he was trying to telepathically apologise to me. All I did was give the guy a friendly smile to let him know it was alright. Hard to say but I think he felt a bit more relieved after it.

"Whoa. Never though he'd have it in him". Mantis whispered to Monkey who nodded in return, making the poor avian blush more.

"Guys, leave him alone". Viper hissed. "I think it's kind of sweet". She smiled towards her friend. Crane nodded in return, thankful for being defended. Thankfully they decided that it was best to drop the subject, thank goodness. I don't know how much more I could take of the subject.

Moving on then, Po's turn. He spun the bottle and it landed on... Mantis.

"Okay Mantis, truth or dare".

"Like you even need to ask? Dare man"! Mantis spoke and acted enthusiastically.

"Oh I'll dare you alright"... Po smiled evilly, getting a bit too into the tension. "I dare you, Mantis, to paralise Shifu tomorrow while he is meditating"!

Ah, sweet justice has been served. The bugs jaw fell open, unable to produce any sound other than "Uhhhhhhhh"...

"You have to you know". I stepped in, adding a bit of insult to injury. "Unless... you'd rather be seen as a coward"?

The anger on his face was all but adorable. Not even the least bit threatening.

"Oh I'll show you"! He blew up. "Just you wait"!

I just continued to smile.

Finally, it was Tigresses turn to spin the bottle. The last shot of the night. I pity the poor fellow who has to suffer her wrath.

She spun the bottle at once. It spun and spun, then began slowing down until it landed... on... Oh dear God no... me...

The moment I managed to convince myself to meet my look with hers, I could have died on the spot as she wore a predatory grin. And the small growl was not in any way comforting...

Looking to the right of the table, all three Crane, Mantis and Monkey had looks of worry as they stared at me. They knew it and I knew it. I'm screwed.

"Alright then, Mike". She spoke with a tone way too calm for my liking. "Truth... or dare"?

I knew that if I had been stupid enough to pick truth, she would have made me severly pay for it. In gallons of blood. So despite it seeming like a stupid decision, I had no choice... May God have mercy on my soul...

"Dare"... I managed to squeak out, much to Tigresses amusement.

"Very well. In that case I dare you to be my sparing partner all throughout next week".

Oh no...

No one... absolutley no one in the world would be able to spar against Tigress and walk away without some form of injury! The only one who could was Po, since he and Tigress were rather close. But me? Sparing with Tigress for a whole week after the dare I made HER do?! All I knew was that I'd need more than Mantis's accupuncture skills to make me feel better. I'd be lucky if I return without any broken bones!

Thankfully though we were done. The game was now over! I slithered out of my chair, wishing the others a good night before returning to my room. The only place I wanted to be right now.

So... I guess some good came out of that game... But the cons outweigh the pros from where I'm standing. I'm going to have hell to deal with tomorrow! Dealing with Tigress and her fists of iron, telling Shifu about Viper being with child, and the noghtmares I'm going to suffer imagining Crane and Viper making out!

...

NOW DO YOU SEE WHY I DIDN'T WANT TO PLAY IN THE FIRST PLACE?!

 **...**

 **Hi everyone, thanks for reading this one shot story!**

 **Okay, so like the summary mentioned, this story was for a competition. I had a lot of fun writing this and added a couple of shippings to it too ;) It was a nice break from my primary story, but now it's back to work on Kung Fu Python now, so hope you all enjoyed reading. Cheerio!**


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